When getting it right takes more out of you than anyone can see.
You might be capable, conscientious and used to being the person others can rely on.
You keep the plates spinning. You anticipate what needs to be done. You think about how other people are feeling. You set high standards for yourself - and often work incredibly hard to meet them.
But maintaining it all can come at a cost.
You might overthink decisions because you're afraid of making the wrong one. Put things off because you're not sure you can do them well enough. Say yes when you want to say no. Replay conversations afterwards, wondering whether you said the wrong thing. Or achieve something you've worked towards, only to quickly move the goalposts again.
Underneath it all can be a persistent feeling that who you are isn't quite enough - so you keep trying to become more capable, more successful, more helpful, more likeable or simply better.
You may have learned to measure your worth by how well you perform, how little you disappoint others and how successfully you hold everything together.
These patterns aren't as separate as they seem.
Perfectionism. People-pleasing. Procrastination. Overthinking. Self-doubt. Difficulty saying no.
They can look very different on the surface. But often, they are different attempts to manage the same underlying fear:
What if I get it wrong, disappoint someone, fail - and what does that say about me?
My work is about understanding what's underneath these patterns, rather than simply trying harder to overcome them.
Work With Me
Whether you're looking to change these patterns in your own life or want to bring psychological insight into your organisation, there are two ways we can work together.
Therapy & Coaching
For people exhausted by the pressure to get things right, keep everyone happy and hold everything together.
I work with people struggling with perfectionism, people-pleasing, self-doubt, procrastination and the persistent feeling of not being enough - helping you understand what's driving these patterns and develop a different relationship with yourself.
Speaking & Workshops
Psychology for healthier, high-performing workplaces.
I deliver talks and workshops exploring the psychology of pressure, performance and wellbeing - helping people understand the patterns that shape how they perform, communicate, make decisions and relate to one another at work.
Psychology for healthier, more sustainable performance at work
High performance depends on more than skills and ability.
Fear of getting things wrong can stop capable people speaking up. Self-doubt can lead to overpreparing or holding back.
The need to prove yourself can make it difficult to switch off. And high standards can quietly become unsustainable ones.
My talks and workshops make these psychological dynamics understandable and practical — helping individuals, teams and leaders recognise what's happening beneath the surface and respond differently.
The Psychology of Sustainable High Performance
How to perform at your best without running yourself into the ground.
Psychological Safety Under Pressure
Creating the conditions for people to speak, challenge and contribute.
Confidence Under Pressure
Why capable people doubt themselves — and what actually helps.
The Cost of Always Being Capable
When high expectations and performance become psychologically exhausting.
About Dr Vicki
I'm Dr Vicki Mackay, a psychologist and speaker.
I've spent my career helping people understand the psychological patterns that influence how they think, feel, behave and relate - both in individual work and organisational settings.
I'm particularly interested in what happens when self-worth becomes tied to achievement, getting things right and other people's approval - and how this can show up as perfectionism, people-pleasing, self-doubt, anxiety or avoidance.
My approach combines psychological depth with practical application. Rather than focusing only on changing what someone does, I'm interested in understanding what is driving the pattern in the first place.
Today, my work spans individual psychological support and corporate speaking and workshops, exploring the psychology of self-worth, identity, pressure and performance.
You don't have to become a better version of yourself to be worthy of the life you're living.
You can have high standards without punishing yourself when you fall short.
You can care about other people without making their happiness your responsibility.
You can make decisions without knowing they'll turn out perfectly.
You can pursue what matters to you without waiting until you're certain you won't fail.
And you can be ambitious without using achievement as evidence that you're enough.
Sometimes the work isn't about becoming someone better. It's about no longer believing you have to.